I put my big girl pants on and went for it. I did sooo good I’m already done and flying solo and I get to go to the 23-09 shift!  (There is sarcasm in there) It was a big decision, because I will probably never dispatch again, but it was an open door and it came at the right time.

Some days it really sucks.

I’ve been called a bitch, been screamed at, my work ‘friends’ stopped inviting me to things and I’ve been made into a show on more than one occasion in front of other employees.   But I do like to think that those people who rush at me when I first walk in, because they waited for me to ask for help…is a good sign (and those people who act like a**holes are just miserable all around and not anymore unhappy because of my existence).

My social awkwardness is improving, which I’m counting as a win, because of all the uncomfortable conversations and encounters I’ve now been thrust into. I’ve been in my boss’s office more in the past few months than in the past 8 years and I stopped bursting into tears just opening the door (another win).

All in all I’m getting there.  I remind myself everyday of all the things I have to be grateful for, make sure I wash the bare essentials and roll into the office with a good attitude.